
As we all know, money is a top point of contention among couples, and if you and your spouse-to-be don't agree on how to manage your finances.... well, you better get on the same page - quick! Money can be such a hot point for arguments - how to spend, how to save, what major purchases are smart, what major purchases are poorly chosen. I think many of us have had the talk where we had to explain to our fiances how much a visit to the salon can really cost sometimes. "No, Dear, highlights and a cut for $20 only exists where you are best buds with the proprietor." "Um, yeah, sometimes shoes cost more than $10."
You get the picture. Joining finances with your hubs inevitably requires openness and flexibility in an area where many people are reluctant to have full disclosure. Exchanging FICO scores can be a big relationship moment! ;)
Mr. Dragon and I have started to join our finances due to our impending wedding. In working together for our financial fitness, I am going to share with you a few things that have helped us, along with some great points learned in my financial seminar that has totally motivated me into addressing the 800 pound gorilla in the room: money.
1) The best financial advisor you will ever hire is YOU. I will be the first person to tell you that I have a lot to learn about types of investments, retirement accounts. Do not EVER be completely reliant on ANYBODY else when it comes to your retirement accounts, savings, etc. Many of us are not financial wizards, but we should all take time to educate ourselves before signing any checks over to any person or company. Being in control of your money is up to you, and in the end - you are responsible for your own financial decisions!
2) Emotions have no place in financial decisions. We have all felt the pangs of "But I have had a really hard week - I deserve this!" That should be your signal to step away. The healthy attitude is "I deserve to be fiscally healthy." Don't buy impulsively, and think through big purchases before making them. Ask yourself, "Am I making a smart purchase?"
3) If you don't have a savings or emergency account, start one today! Putting money into savings each paycheck should be like another bill you have to pay. It's not how big your paycheck is - it's what you do with it. Even if it's $5 per paycheck, get yourself into the habit of consistently paying into that savings account, and put in a large amount if you can. It's not IF a rainy day hits, it's WHEN. I had my own rainy day a couple years ago, and ever since then, I pay into a savings account religiously.
NOW, here are also a few minor habits that have been really helpful for me and Mr. Dragon in combining our finances - if this helps you, that's great!
- Create a chronological calendar of bills that need to be paid: including grocery, gas, and "fun" allowances. If you are paid every two weeks... break those bills into two groups and assign each bill to the appropriate paycheck to be paid. For instance, if your electric bill needs to be paid February 5th, then assign that bill to your February 1st paycheck. This will help you plan your spending and reduce frantic bill paying. Once two people come into the bill paying mix... things can get quite complicated, and I've found this method to work well!
- Pay your bills ON Payday, before doing ANYTHING else. Then it's done.
- When you get a bonus at work or receive an IRS tax refund... be deliberate in how you use that money. Don't fritter it away. Use it to sink into savings for a down payment for a house or to purchase something that you and the fiance really need or want and have thought carefully about. There is nothing worse than realizing you have spent your tax refund on...wait, what DID I spend it on?
- Be honest. This is SO obvious, but can be difficult. When you goof up, tell your partner. This goes back to keeping emotion out of money. We all make mistakes, and it's better to address finding a fix for those mistakes, rather than trying to hide the problem because you are embarrassed.
- Find where you are throwing money away, and eliminate those bills. For instance, if you are getting a lot of parking tickets for an expired license plate... that is just throwing money away! Try to keep yourself out of those situations.
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