"I'm Just Not That Creative" and Other Modern Myths

"The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover is yourself." -Alan Alda

Quite often, I run across message board posts and blog posts from brides lamenting the amazing weddings they have attended or seen on the internet. I hear "I could never pull that off" or "I am just not that creative." Not true, my friends! Creativity is all about confidence.

Here is the single most important truth in creative confidence: If you like it, chances are - others will like it, too. Everyone - EVERYONE - is creative. The more you act on your creative ideas, the more you will sharpen your instincts as to what works and what doesn't.

We are all human beings with different talents. Everybody is good at something, and most anything you are good at - requires creativity. So yeah, you may not be a craft Jedi-master that can create her own prom dress out of fabric you wove on a loom yourself (and grew the cotton in your backyard, but of course) - BUT you may be someone who can envision a theme, a look for your wedding and hire somebody else to actualize that look for you. You may be someone who can make her guests feel special in an amazingly creative and personal way. Maybe you can put together an incredibly unconventional menu or write a ceremony that is romantic and fits your personality perfectly. Everyone is creative - you just need the confidence to be yourself and let your creativity flag fly (or your freak flag, as luck may have it!) Let it out!

Another element to free-flowing creativity is trial and error. If you have an idea, try it. There are a number of people who feel comfortable saying things like "In my life, the thing I am most afraid of is failure." I could not disagree more with this statement! We fail every day - and we WIN every day! Personally, I love to fail - it's not something you can get away from, AND, it's not so bad to fail now and then. Half of the time when I try something new, I get it right; the other half the time, I find out how NOT to do something! The world will not end if you fail at something. Here's the deal, if you are too scared to voice your creative opinions or try out one of your possibly fantabulous ideas.... you are just saying no to yourself - and why would you want to do that?

Once you stop playing that tape in your head that says "you can't," chances are - you WILL! Have any of you Bees recently opened the creative floodgates? Did you find yourself in a crisis of confidence? Or what thoughts or practices have helped you heighten your creative flow??

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Oh to Get Married Every Year!

Weddings tend to be creativity on Speed... theoretically. We all want our weddings to be personal, fun, and aesthetically pleasing. Although I am so excited about our Van Gogh theme, of course with all the wedding research, I inevitably run into other themes I wish I could incorporate, as well! Right now, the idea of a Frank Lloyd Wright wedding tickles my fancy. I wish I could have a second wedding so I could realize my visions of chandeliers, vintage martini glasses, and sleek, trim lines. Hmmm, maybe one of YOU should have a Frank Lloyd Wright wedding and send me the pictures instead!! ;)

Andrew Lloyd Wright Wedding - by Alloyall on Polyvore.com

All of My Bright Colors

"Isn't it a crying shame that nothing ever stays the same I can't fit into that wedding dress or be 23 again but you're looking at me now like you don't know who I am.

All of the bright colors that live inside of me are now just tiny little pieces of what used to be and it just feels like confetti."

The lyrics above are from a song called "Confetti," by one of my FAVORITE singer-songwriters, Lori McKenna. Lori's music is all so heartfelt and deeply personal. She is a mother of five from Stoughton, Massachusetts, and she has quickly risen to be a highly respected writer in the music world. If you've never heard of her before, YOU MUST, MUST, MUST check her out. She is amazing.

Anyway, "Confetti" is written from the perspective of a woman reflecting on life after her wedding day. She sings about how different and lost she feels after many years of marriage, and the difficulty of hanging on to individuality and identity when being in a long-term relationship. The song is sad, but a good topic of conversation (in MY opinion, anyhow!)

A few years ago, Lance Armstrong's (of yellow vest fame!) ex-wife Kristin wrote a book and ran the talk show circuit discussing how her biggest mistake in marriage was to completely throw away her identity. She says in her famous Glamour magazine article (5/1/2006) ...

"If you ask me today what I truly love, I can easily tell you I love God, my family, my friends, fireworks displays, a good red wine, staying up late with a mystery novel, a sweaty run, painting abstract art, indulging my organizational compulsions, laughing until no sound comes out and taking my time. If you had asked me when I was married what I loved, I would have automatically told you the things that I loved about my husband: the confident, easy way he traveled between countries..., or the way he could fearlessly MSH (our acronym for "Make shit happen..."), or the little-known fact that he is a good photographer."

Mr. Dragon and I have been together for four years now, a mere blip on the lifetime we plan to spend together - However, I already feel pangs of guarding my identity. We are going to go through our life TOGETHER, and because that involves two people, compromise closely follows. When you are in a serious relationship, personally, (and this is just my opinion) I don't see how anyone can retain - in full - their complete and total sense of self. Eventually, you are likely going to have to compromise on SOMETHING: that spontaneous road trip, drinks with your ex-boyfriend, taking a job overseas. You get the picture.

BUT, if we are careful, I don't see why it would be impossible to maintain the core of who we are. I know what I am willing to compromise and what I am not willing to give up. Mr. Dragon has his own core that I need to respect, as well. I can definitely see how marriage over the years can corrode your sense of self, especially when kids come into the picture! Some women identify solely as the "wife" or the "mother"... To me, those are only parts to a person, it's not WHO they are. They are roles, not who you are as a person. If those roles so take over your life that you have no idea who you really are anymore... I can see how you would feel like "Confetti," as Lori McKenna sings.

Right now, I would be seen as a "career woman" or "Mr. Dragon's Babe" [TIME OUT FOR A ;)!!!] However, I am Miss Snapdragon, who loves horrible TV shows and long books and is funny (sometimes!) and enjoys playing with her new KitchenAid mixer. I avoid unkind people and I despise taking out the trash. I love fashionable clothes but hate shopping. I am a horrible liar, and people can trust me. I'm happy. That's part of who I really am, and for me, I want to protect that as much as I can.

For me, this is a hugely important issue. We've all heard stories about women who are harried, exhausted, and live in their sweats. I don't want that to happen to me. I don't want Mr. Dragon to become that husband that stops taking care of himself or who never does anything fun for himself ever either. Of course, check back in with me in ten years, but I hope we evolve rather than disintegrate into shells of ourselves. We'll do the best we can to support each other. For me, I want to grow, rather than twist and turn.

Is identity something that any of you are consciously protecting?

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Help Me with Mah Hair!

So I have been thinking about an exceedingly important subject for the past month or so. So, SO important! What color shall my hair be on my wedding day? :)

I am the queen of cutting and coloring my hair. I have had red hair, bad hair, black hair, short hair, long hair, blonde hair, good hair, brown hair... you get the idea. (Case in point below.) Right now, my hair is kind of an auburn ("kind of" being the operative phrase!) and I totally think it's fine, but... I think my wedding hair should be supa' fine! Please take a look at the choices below, and help me figure out what the heck to do with my totally average hair! Who else is about to makeover their locks? Pre-wedding color, post-wedding chop!

Brown Hair


Blonde Hair


Super-Dark Hair (framed nicely by C-Snap and Snappy T)


Red Hair (framed nicely by a fruity drink!)


***Mrs. Bee and Pengy, would you mind making a poll here? Thanks!***

Bears, Beets, and Battlestar Galactica

If you don't get the "Bears, Beets,..." reference... see The Office, Season 3, Episode 20. HIGH-larious.

When I was in my early twenties, this is what my Friday nights USED to look like:

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Now that I am thirty, this is what my Friday nights look like:

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Thankfully, Mr. Dragon is on the same page! Friday nights have become "Crash on the Couch" night for both of us. When I first met Mr. Dragon, he actually was way ahead of me. One of the first conversations we had was about how we "could never go out on Friday nights, because... that's Sci-Fi Friday night!!!!!!"

Are. you. kidding me. Mr. Dragon does not LOOK like a Sci Fi geek... but he is! And he has forced me into joining him. In my single life, I was a lover of The Twilight Zone, but that was about as far as I went into Sci-Fi World. Because clearly Friday night was going to become our "staying in" night, I was wise and gave Sci-Fi Fridays a chance.

Mr. Dragon set aside an entire weekend for the sole purpose of brainwashing me into his favorite show Battlestar Galactica. Um, I fell in love. The show is a remake (and WHAT a remake it is...) of an old seventies show about the Cylons (a human-created race of machines, some of whom look just like humans) waging war on humanity, many years in the future. The Cylons nearly eradicate the human race, who are running away from the Cylons, through space, trying to find their original home: Earth.

Laugh it up, Bees (!) but BSG, as aficionados call it, is the best show ever created, featuring perhaps the most incredible and sexiest action hero ever: Starbuck (who was a man in the original series!) I LOVE it! The final season just started, and you best believe the Snapdragons are nailed to the couch every Friday for the next few weeks, enjoying our favorite show together.

Let's not kid ourselves, we know wedding planning is not a fiesta ALL the time. For us, we've found that taking dedicated time to relax really helps minimizes those petty arguments that pop up due to wedding+life stress. SO, Hive, in the midst of wedding planning, how do you relax with your partner? Dinner? Dates? Ridiculously nerdy television shows? ;)

Dwight and I would totally be besties.

Money Madness

I am all in a tizzy, Hive! Last week, I attended a financial seminar taught by a well-known financial expert. I was so excited to attend, and boy, it was no disappointment.

As we all know, money is a top point of contention among couples, and if you and your spouse-to-be don't agree on how to manage your finances.... well, you better get on the same page - quick! Money can be such a hot point for arguments - how to spend, how to save, what major purchases are smart, what major purchases are poorly chosen. I think many of us have had the talk where we had to explain to our fiances how much a visit to the salon can really cost sometimes. "No, Dear, highlights and a cut for $20 only exists where you are best buds with the proprietor." "Um, yeah, sometimes shoes cost more than $10."

You get the picture. Joining finances with your hubs inevitably requires openness and flexibility in an area where many people are reluctant to have full disclosure. Exchanging FICO scores can be a big relationship moment! ;)

Mr. Dragon and I have started to join our finances due to our impending wedding. In working together for our financial fitness, I am going to share with you a few things that have helped us, along with some great points learned in my financial seminar that has totally motivated me into addressing the 800 pound gorilla in the room: money.

1) The best financial advisor you will ever hire is YOU. I will be the first person to tell you that I have a lot to learn about types of investments, retirement accounts. Do not EVER be completely reliant on ANYBODY else when it comes to your retirement accounts, savings, etc. Many of us are not financial wizards, but we should all take time to educate ourselves before signing any checks over to any person or company. Being in control of your money is up to you, and in the end - you are responsible for your own financial decisions!

2) Emotions have no place in financial decisions. We have all felt the pangs of "But I have had a really hard week - I deserve this!" That should be your signal to step away. The healthy attitude is "I deserve to be fiscally healthy." Don't buy impulsively, and think through big purchases before making them. Ask yourself, "Am I making a smart purchase?"

3) If you don't have a savings or emergency account, start one today! Putting money into savings each paycheck should be like another bill you have to pay. It's not how big your paycheck is - it's what you do with it. Even if it's $5 per paycheck, get yourself into the habit of consistently paying into that savings account, and put in a large amount if you can. It's not IF a rainy day hits, it's WHEN. I had my own rainy day a couple years ago, and ever since then, I pay into a savings account religiously.

NOW, here are also a few minor habits that have been really helpful for me and Mr. Dragon in combining our finances - if this helps you, that's great!

• Create a chronological calendar of bills that need to be paid: including grocery, gas, and "fun" allowances. If you are paid every two weeks... break those bills into two groups and assign each bill to the appropriate paycheck to be paid. For instance, if your electric bill needs to be paid February 5th, then assign that bill to your February 1st paycheck. This will help you plan your spending and reduce frantic bill paying. Once two people come into the bill paying mix... things can get quite complicated, and I've found this method to work well!
  
• Pay your bills ON Payday, before doing ANYTHING else. Then it's done.
  
• When you get a bonus at work or receive an IRS tax refund... be deliberate in how you use that money. Don't fritter it away. Use it to sink into savings for a down payment for a house or to purchase something that you and the fiance really need or want and have thought carefully about. There is nothing worse than realizing you have spent your tax refund on...wait, what DID I spend it on?
• Be honest. This is SO obvious, but can be difficult. When you goof up, tell your partner. This goes back to keeping emotion out of money. We all make mistakes, and it's better to address finding a fix for those mistakes, rather than trying to hide the problem because you are embarrassed.
• Find where you are throwing money away, and eliminate those bills. For instance, if you are getting a lot of parking tickets for an expired license plate... that is just throwing money away! Try to keep yourself out of those situations.
  

There's another element to this, of course. The unemployment rate in the USA is on the ups, which is an entirely different set of rules to address the stress involved in finding a new job. For those of you bees that are unexpectedly job searching in the midst of wedding planning, do you have any tips for others on how to address the stress? For all: What are your savviest financial habits?

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Gifts that a Dragon Could Love

***Mr. Dragon, I know you say you don't read my posts, but sometimes, like Miss Dumpling, I suspect that you are totally lying to me. You don't get to read this one!!!***

***Seriously, I will kill you!***

I have been thinking about what to give the Mister on our wedding day for a long time. The first idea was to score Chicago Bears season tickets. Mmm, yeah. Anybody who lives in Chicago is totally laughing at me because they know how fruitless a quest that is! I don't know if it's easier to get NFL season tickets elsewhere in the U.S. of A., but in Chicago... good luck, sister. There is a fee to get on the waiting list, and then you have to wait - sometimes a ridiculously long time. And - oh yeah - Season tickets are super expensive.

So that is NOT happening (tear.) Think, think, thinkity think - I thought up a new gift that will be both meaningful and useful!

*Mrs. Bee and Mrs. Pengy - please jump/break here!

Mr. Dragon is the king of deciding he wants to do something... and then doing it. One day, he decided to learn Spanish... and so he did. He decided he wanted to learn to play guitar and be in a band... and so he did. He started playing guitar about two years ago, and now he's pretty good. His band is about a year old. They play together for fun, and then gig every once in awhile.

Mr. D is at the point where his starter guitar no longer cuts the mustard. When he first began to play, he bought a mid-range guitar that is perfectly decent. Now, however, he is ready for a higher end acoustic model. I just know this would make a wonderful and special wedding present.

I am crossing my fingers that he won't purchase a new guitar before our wedding... so that I can buy it instead! Snapsister A is a professional musician (when she starts talking music... it's like Greek to me!) so I am hoping she can help me pick something out. I can't wait - I know he will love it!

I also have one other present I want to give him. For the first few months of our relationship, Mr. Dragon lived about two hours away, and I only saw him on weekends. However, we wrote each other two to five times a day over email. I think I am going to make a Blurb book with a combination of those early emails and the nicest photos of us. I'll wait to make it until we get our engagement photos done.

Between the guitar and the Digital Love Letter (as I am calling it) Book - I think Mr. D will be SET! What are you giving your Husband-in-Waiting?

Any Day but a Saturday...

One of the biggest wedding rule-of-thumbs is, if you need to cut costs... trim your guest list, trim your guest list, trim your guest list.

Another well-known budget guideline is... have your wedding on a Friday, a Sunday, a Monday, a Tuesday... any day but Saturday!!!

My question to the Hive is... is that really true?

The Snapdragons are getting married on an off-day. This was NOT the plan. I was dead freakin' set on getting married on a Saturday night. I didn't want people having to leave work early if we chose a Friday, and I just felt that a Saturday would provide for maximum relaxation for all concerned.

Once we started our venue search, however, we ran into road block after road block where cost was concerned. The places we could afford for a Saturday night were just WAY off of what I wanted. Mr. Dragon and I wanted grassy knoll and nature, but the places we could afford just did not hold that leafy beauty in the cards. We also love to cook, and though I am no Julia Child, I am a pretty decent cook, and I appreciate high end food. Almost uniformly, we are friends with a bunch of Foodies and a couple Gourmets.

"No," "no," "no," was basically how each venue visit went. Finally, a venue we had dismissed as "too 'spensive" came back into the picture... all because we were willing to go with a Friday night. For our venue, they are willing to reduce their food/beverage minimum for off nights, thus making them within reach.

This is fairly common practice among venues - reduced minimums for off-nights. I would say that this was our biggest benefit in being flexible and moving to an off night. In making our decision, we polled our family and friends first. "So, um, I have a weird question... if we were to have our wedding on a Friday night, would it be a huge pain for you? Do you think you would still come?"

Amazingly, the answer was YES on all fronts. Our family could come; our friends could come. Actually, we had several friends say "What's the big deal? Of course I am coming to your wedding, Sillypants." Wow, this off-night thing didn't seem so bad after all! SO, we did it. The die-hard Saturday night couple became Friday night aficionados.



Now, when it came to coordinating the other elements of our wedding, the off night thing was not so obvious. We received little discounts here and there, but I suspect (because our vendors are universally AWESOME) that our vendors are just nice people, rather than giving us discounts due to choosing an off night. My suspicion would be that if we chose vendors who were at the mid point in their careers, that perhaps an off night would be a great negotiation point. Our vendors are almost entirely friend-recommended, so we have a prior relationship to which we can attribute their kind cost cuts. I am not sure that an off night would have made a difference if we were total strangers to our vendors. The SUPER high end guys were virtually every night of the week - they don't have an "off-night."

In conclusion, my diagnosis is that the biggest budget savers for us were in keeping our guest list under tight control (only people we KNOW, the entire Junior League is not invited!) AND signing ourselves to a lower food/beverage minimum, which will give us a much more comfy place to fall, budgetarily speaking.

For you off Saturday night brides, do you have any words of wisdom to share with the ladies and gents who might be in "Wedding Date Limbo?" Would you recommend the route you have chosen to others?

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Chi City Meetup

So round about the New Year, Miss Meatball and I not only had the pleasure of meeting each other in "real life," but the supreme pleasure of meeting Chicago Bees L and C, as well as Miss Meatball's MOH MaPo! Margaritas, queso, and delicioso Mexican food was the order of the day! We met up at Uncle Julio's Hacienda in Chicago's Lincoln Park neighborhood - since Mr. Meatball used to work there, Miss Meatball had the inside scoop! We had a great time getting to know each other, and I can't wait for our next Chi-town meetup! Here are a few pics from the day...

Rockin' Chicago Bees C and L... C is planning her upcoming Vegas wedding in but a few months. She brought her invites, which were so cool, and we all agreed that we want to crash her wedding. C'mon, a full-on Vegas wedding, who could turn that down?!? L was for sure the resident venue expert. She shared her venue search, and how it came down to two, both had some combination of chandeliers, vintage bars, etc. - I totally think she should be a venue consultant in her spare time, because she knew about amazing venues that I totally missed in my own venue search!

Miss Meatball and her Best bud MaPo. They had been taking care of a few wedding errands and shared their adventures with all. I can totally tell that "Dildo Weekend" was a ton of fun!

Safe to say that we have healthy appetites!! Hey, the diets don't have to get back on track til January 2nd - everyone knows THAT!

Miss Meatball and Miss Snap, representing the redheads! Do not be fooled by the seemingly harmless streets behind us. Right now, Chicago is covered in lethal snowbanks!

Adios, amigos!

The Boys Who Came Before

About a month or so ago, two friends and I met up to stuff our faces with guacamole and tacos, with a side or four of beers. These particular girlyfriends are officially hitched to their respective lovahs, while I am myself also on the verge of eternal marital commitment (Duh!) Somehow we started talking about prior relationships, romantic entanglements and "Falling Hard" vs. "Falling Easy."

From Mr. Dragon's and my first year together:

For me, I have had one SERIOUS boytoy predating Mr. Dragon. Other than that, I dated a few guys. Most of them were very nice; some were tools (some were even toolboxes!) There was the opera singer that I fell in love with practically overnight, and he broke my heart into teeny pieces. There was the Ross and Rachel romance that never really got off the ground (hence the obligatory lesson of friends vs. lovers.) There was a superhot motorcycle McHottie, but that's about all there was to that. Um, scorchingly hot though. Seriously, girls.

I fell hard for a few of them. Some lasted for a few months; a couple love affairs drug out in a lethal back-and-forth over a number of years. Sometimes the emotions were on overdrive with a lot of unnecessary drama. When I met Mr. Dragon though, the unnecessary drama was non-existent. WHAT a concept! I had all the fun, lovie dovie feelings, except without all the crappy stuff. Blew. My Mind. It was EASY. I didn't have to tread carefully when we had disagreements. I didn't worry about him backing out when he found out about all those ugly blemishes we all have hidden away When we had serious conversations, I didn't have to edit myself. We laid everything we were feeling out there on the table.

Everything was just so effortless, even when we were mad at each other. We were able to be straight with each other without a second's thought. Not to say we don't fight, because we TOTALLY do. The difference is that there are no games or jockeying for power. Just easy and real, without plastic trappings that characterized our past love lives. We had a lot to work through when it came to detoxing from our previous experiences that had colored our ideas of love. Fortunately we both knew that the detoxing had nothing to do with US; it had to do with processing the mistakes of the past. I am so glad to have found somebody for whom I have fallen BOTH hard and easily. Though we have been through a lot in our four years together, we have also built a relationship that supports and celebrates each other. I am sure we will have many more hurdles to cross in our life together, but I know that we are a team that will pick each other up - always.

Besides, how can you NOT love a face like this??

Image Source: Mr. Dragon's 2nd grade photographer :)

Dresses, Dresses, Everywhere

On my road to the altar... I have never bought so many dresses in my life! I must confess, I am a bit of a Scrooge. Ok, a huge Scrooge. I put a significant percentage of my income in savings (although right now my monthly savings has been diverted to the Wedding Fund!) This is purely because I just don't. spend. my money. If I have any money leftover at the end of the month, that goes into savings, too. I tend to save, rather than spend (even when I really ought to.) Ya dig? It drives Mr. Dragon nuts, as I can always find a reason to hang on to money, instead of making any sort of purchase. He has been trying to get me to go in on Rock Band with him for about a year now.

I am NOT saying this is a good thing, necessarily, as I could definitely stand to spend a bit more money on my closet, etc.! I bargain shop EVERYTHING. In the present economy, I have become Super Scrooge, fo' sho'.

As far as the wedding goes, this Scrooginess has manifested itself in that I have zero clothing suitable for the myriad wedding events leading up to the actual Big Day. I need dresses for engagement photos, showers, and the rehearsal dinner. So far, I think I am doing pretty well. What I find ironic is that so far, the wedding projects I most dreaded have been the easiest so far (namely, bridesmaid dress shopping.) Apparently, the dress gods love me right now!!

Remember my trip to that vintage clothing shop near my home town over the holidays? Well, amazingly, they had a dress in my size that I LOVED. No stains, no tears - great condition. White is not the best color for photos, so this probably won't make it into my engagement photos (unless my photographer okays it.) However, since white IS my current proscribed color... I am sure I will find a use for it at some bridely event! Satin, beading, it's beautiful, and it was much, much more affordable than it looks. One thing I will say for sure... only white wine for me in this dress. :)

Now I love the look of things all pinned up, so I honed in on this lil' lady immediately! This was the most expensive of the three dresses in my bridely closet, but I loved the dress so much that the expense was worth unhinging my death-claw pocketbook! I was also able to use an extremely kind birthday gift card to cut my cost significantly. This dress would work quite nicely for a shower, or for the rehearsal dinner (especially with a pair of patent pumps!) You think?

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Anthropologie is NOT known for affordable prices (understatement of the year!) but I HAVE found their sales to be fantastic. This blue babe WAS $288, but marked all the way down to $69.95.

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And did I mention the taffeta petticoat? I REALLY couldn't turn this dress down - Scrunchy Yumminess, getinmymouf! I like to visit it in my closet! I am thinking Engagement Photos for this one...

How are you building your bridely wardrobe? Is there a store you love that at first glance is unaffordable, but has particularly incredible sales? Spill, so we can all gain from your wisdom!

Bootiful Bridesmaids: The $100 Challenge

Six lovely ladies have agreed to stand up with me as I become Mrs. Dragon this summer (although I am thinking of hyphenating to Mrs. Snappy-Dragon, I must confess.) ;) Because I have massive Bridal Guilt, Mr. Dragon and I very much wanted to pay for the bridesmaids' dresses. The downside is that we are on a budget of $100 or less for each dress. As we all know, shopping for a fabulous dress under $100 CAN be a challenge requiring hours of research and likely numerous fruitless shopping excursions. Good luck, sister.

Well, we have procured three of the bridesmaids dresses so far, and have surprisingly spent only $116.58. Total. Of course I will share my methods! The best part is that these dresses don't skimp on quality, are completely appropriate, and suit the personalities of each wearer perfectly. Because my six bridesmaids are a wide range of sizes and ages (think super-petite to supermodel-tall, etc.,) we elected to dress the bridesmaids in differing blue cocktail dresses of their own choosing. We are also going off-the-rack, as alterations are not in the budget!

SNAPSISTER L (Matron of Honor:)

Snapsis L is 2.5 years younger than me, and though taller, she has similar dimensions. Her taste in fashion is also exactly like mine. In scoping out bridesmaids dresses, I was drawn to a dress that hangs in my own closet, only worn once:

She tried it on while visiting me earlier in the fall, she loved it, it fit - DONE!
The Bottom Line: Free!

SNAPSISTER J (Bridesmaid:)

Snapsister J wanted a dress with a substantial neckline, as well as some sort of sleeviness. Having a brainwave, I decided to check the JCPenney website and found the perfect dress:

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The Bottom Line: Originally $120, reduced on sale to $86, with an online coupon further reduced to $73.20 = $81.72, including shipping and taxes.

SNAPSISTER I (Bridesmaid:)

Snapsister I is a junior in high school, so that presented age-appropriate dress issues. We wanted to make sure we didn't pick a dress that was too "old" for her. Enter Snappymom and www.like.com. We had been searching for awhile to find something that Snapsis I would want to wear, with no results. Fortunately, this handy little website compiled many "blue dress" results and yielded THIS from the Gap (except in "Baltic Blue"...)

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The Bottom Line: Originally $78, reduced on sale to $32.99, further reduced via online coupon to $23.99 = $34.86, including taxes and shipping.

Three down, three to go! So far, this is what I have learned...

• Never, never, never purchase anything online without checking sites like retailmenot.com for online coupons - they can really help out your bottom line!
• Websites such as like.com and shopstyle.com can come in super handy when powershopping. They allow you to find options in your price range much more efficiently. Never online shop alone!

So, Hive, what are your super-secret weapons for dress shopping?

My Vintage Heaven

One of the bonuses of flying to Texas for the holidays was the plethora of antique stores and vintage clothing outlets. I made it my mission to find a purse for my wedding day. Obviously, because she is an antiques dealer, Snappymom loves to shop the antique stores, and she is buds with most of the owners, so I knew she would be happy to accompany me. Funny, because all those hours I spent as a child in antique stores was pure torture - I was totally a brat about it! Now I love to go and browse those same racks.

We hit two stores. In the first, Snappymom found a supercute doll and I found a strawberry tea set. (I love, love, love tea. I may have to designate a tea pantry in my home someday.)

Our second stop was Bon Ton, a small, brick building in teeny Forreston, TX, that was converted into 1,200 square feet of vintage clothing. Yes, I said CLOTHING, as in mostly yummy taffeta party dresses and buckly pumps and netted hats. Drool.

I was never so sad that I am not a size 2 as when I set eyes on this crumbcatcher confection...

How hilariously fun are these fluffy boudoir shoes??

And I DID strike gold! Snappymom was so kind and bought this beaded purse as a wedding present. I have carefully wrapped and stowed this purse in a safe place in my closet. I can't wait to use it on my wedding day!

A closeup of the beadwork:

I also found a cocktail dress that fit me (most surviving vintage dresses that I find are size 4 or smaller, so this was quite a miracle.) More on that later!

If you live in the Dallas area and love vintage clothing, chances are you already know about this jewel. If not, you must go. This place really is the best source for vintage clothing I have ever visited and since it is a husband and wife run operation, you get a full-bodied shopping experience (i.e. they will chat you up!) Highly, highly recommended. Anybody else have a secret A+ source for authentic vintage clothing?